I come from a large family. Not personally, I only have one brother, but my Mother is one of 9 children, and I think her mom was one of 10, so with extended relations, it is quite large. We don't keep in touch with everyone, but now with facebook I have expanded my relationships to extend past people that I had known before. Being from a large family, there is a wide range of relationships. In this day and age, divorce happens, childhood out of wedlock happens, shoot just about anything happens. It is accepted, because we are learning that we are just human, and that everyone makes mistakes, or changes feelings. I don't know how well I am explaining things, but understand that sometimes things happen, and while it may seem the best at the time, some people are hurt. I am not angry with anyone (except possibly myself for not being more proactive when I became an adult) about what happened all those years ago. Things happen, and everyone just deals with it the best they can. I know that may sound very coded, but I want those involved to understand before I go on.
My uncle was married and had two daughters, and then divorced. He later remarried and had a daughter and a son. All of whom are great people. His first wife remarried and had a son. Sounds pretty typical. The two daughters, Stacey and Sarah were 1 and 2 years younger than me, and while they did divorce at a young age, I do remember spending time with them. We lost touch after the divorce, and I very rarely heard about them. When our High School team went to the state championships, I did get a chance to see them, but that was about the extent of my connection.
I heard later that Sarah had a baby boy, when I was pregnant with Aidan, and the first 3 great grandchildren in the family were boys all born within about a year of each other Adahy, Austin, and Aidan. Even though I was not in touch with her, it made me feel a little closer. Looking back now, I am sad to say, the warm feelings was about all I had. I never made any attempt to reconnect with Sarah or Stacey at that point.
I moved to Germany with my husband, and when I had Mackenzie, Sarah also had her second child, Lilli. It is amazing to me how much our lives paralleled even though we were not in touch. Of course, from what I have heard about Sarah, we were probably as different as night and day. She sounds like she was a beautiful soul, raising her children in Hawaii, living the culture. Sounds like it was a very peaceful existence.
I am not sure if she was married to Adahy and Lilli's dad or not, but that is not really relevant. At some point she was no longer involved with him, and started a relationship with another man. It was not a healthy relationship. She had been asked by Stacey and their brother to leave him, come back to the states, but she just could not do it. In the fall of 2005, she was pregnant with her third child. In October of that year, my father passed away, and I was in Florida with my mom and the kids until Veteran's day. Thanksgiving weekend we got a call from my uncle that Sarah had been beaten to death by her boyfriend. She was being kept on life support until the baby could be delivered. Josiah Darcy Fay was born on December 12th, and then they let Sarah go.
Josiah was adopted by Sarah's brother and his brand new wife. I am very happy for that. Shortly after Sarah died, Fran (Stacey and Sarah's mom) passed away from cancer. Mom and I were able to travel to central Illinois to attend the memorial. It was good to see Stacey again. Her brother (who was about 5 last time I saw him) was proudly carrying Josiah around. Since that time I have reconnected with Stacey on facebook, and while it is not as good of a relationship as it might have been, at least I have one with her.
It is now 5 years later, and this man, Marwaan Jackson, is just now on trial for her death. It truly amazes me that it can take this long for someone to be tried for the crimes he committed. I truly hope for justice to be served. I have found some references to Sarah, and am truly surprised by how many women are killed at the hands of someone who supposedly loves them. The psychological games that are involved to keep women going back to the relationship are aweful. The worst thing is that Sarah had realized this and had a restraining order against him. One of the neighbors testified on the first day that Marwaan seemed to be more concerned about himself than about the welfare of Sarah after the beating. Unbelievable!
I pray for justice for Sarah. I am sorry for the relationship that I never had, and the beautiful soul I will never know. I am thankful that her three children are healthy and happy. I am thankful for the reconnection with Stacey.
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